Just call me the G-Chat life coach

An unemployed 25-year old in denial about falling in love and growing up is probably the last person to approach for advice on career, love and life in general. Unless I am that 25-year old. My friends come to me for advice on just about anything and everything from wardrobe advice to office etiquette. I despise telephone conversations and e-mails so the best way to reach is via text message or G-Chat (the 21^st century’s instant messenger) and, in this battle, G-Chat wins. Texting is terrible for serious discussions. Seriously, what sadist came up with character limits? Word limits I understand; they make sense. But character limits?! Pure, irrational torture.

Just call me that GoogleTalk (or G-Chat) “Dear Abby.”

This amuses and confuses me. I mean, I am terrified of ending my (f)unemployment, finding a new love and growing another year older. The word “terrified” is an understatement.

At the same time, I almost understand why they think so highly of my opinion. In addition to a lot of time on my hands, I have exceptional clarity and thorough optimism when it comes to their lives.

For the most part, I don’t mind listening to my friends’ problems. I enjoy trying to help them—I mean, what else are friends for, really? And I especially love laughing at the occasional ridiculousness they find themselves in. (I am only human, after all, and I believe seeing the humor in a situation never hurt anybody. It’s better than taking it too seriously, that’s for certain.)

But, once in a while, all I want to do is pull my hair out, rip my ears off and scream at the top of my lungs. Like I said, I am only human. As such, I am not impervious to the draining effect of their constant complaints and queries.

Self-examination is a normal exercise of mine. For me, it is just as vital as breathing, laughing, crying and singing. I can only wish my friends agreed and did the same. I’m sure they would still ask for my input. For instance, when I state something so thoroughly obvious, they tell me, "I know that. I just needed someone else to say it." I understand the need for an external perspective but a little self-analysis would still go a long way in getting to the heart of the problem and allowing me to return to my life outside the G-Chat life coach role: an unemployed 25-year-old woman with many of her own problems.